Our flight to Dubai leaves at 4.30am and T spends the hours beforehand ranting about how it is ALL MY FAULT and how we are leaving at an inhuman hour. He is right about the inhumanity, but wrong about it being my fault, since he refused to spend the night in Dubai, making the 4.30 flight our only option. Please feel free to inform him of this.

I tell him my concern about Emirates being such a good airline that they would have a million delightful movies that I would be unable to resist. He tells me not to be ridiculous, that we haven’t slept in a day and it would be foolish to stay awake even longer. I nod in agreement, and then sit in my seat. The first movie listed (out of 250+) is Juno and I tell him there is no way I will be sleeping. Instead, I spend most of the flight cracking up until he finally gives in and watches it himself, snorting with laughter from time to time.

When we land, the little boy in front of me starts to reach his tiny hand through the seats to touch mine. I whisper to him as we pull into the gate, and then his parents speak to us. They are en route to Houston, which means they have a long road ahead. Their son, who is about two, is delighted to be on the plane, and they’re hoping he will keep it up.

We get a bus for what seems like miles, across the airport. When we get to the terminal, there are people everywhere and I tell T it is easily the busiest airport I have ever seen. We push through the throngs of people to get to the bookstore, where I snatch up two English books and we run to the gate. At the gate, the man behind the counter takes our tickets but tells us we have to wait for our boarding passes. We’re getting an upgrade! I crow to T. He shakes his head sadly. No, they’re separating us and putting us right next to the bathrooms.

GUESS WHO IS RIGHT? Hint: it is the person who is always right. Yes! MEEEEEEEEE! We take advantage of Dubai’s fancy shininess to send a quick email to my parents and then board the Business Class! entrance (when one is speaking about flying Business Class!, it must always be capitalized with an exclamation point). Our seats are wide and soft and recline all the way back, which was especially good since the movies on this plane stink. I eat a CHEESE PLATE! for breakfast, with Real Western Cheese! Oh cheese, how I have missed thee. Paneer just ain’t the same. Anwar the glorious flight attendant gives me the aforementioned cheese, and he is my new BFF, partly because he has to be nice to me, and partly because I think he is gay. I am pretty sure he recognizes me as his queen.

The rest of the time, we sleep. Then we awake in time to see Ethiopia out the window. And, in spite of myself, I start to cry. SHUT UP! I have wanted to see Ethiopia since I was nine years old, and trust me, that was a LONG time ago. Oh, and also, I am a sap.